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What makes us unhappy: a simple explanation according to science

An expert at Harvard gives us a clue about unhappiness: How can you be happier, according to science?...
Author: Patricia Alegsa
14-06-2024 11:41








Hello, curious reader!

Have you ever felt like you're running in a hamster wheel, doing a lot of things but not getting anywhere?

Welcome to the club, my friend, because today we are going to talk about a common mistake that has many of us trapped in that darn wheel: not knowing ourselves enough to understand our own priorities. Yes, that simple oversight is behind much of the unhappiness that lurks around.

Let's shed some light and humor on the matter. Ready?

Imagine you're buying peppers for a recipe you found online, but you don't take the time to check the complete list of ingredients. You fill the cart with things you don't need and then realize you don't have the main ingredient. Oops! That's exactly what it's like when we don't really know what we want or what our priorities are.

Joseph Fuller, a professor at Harvard Business School (yes, that place where everyone seems to have their things in order), says many of his students come with ridiculous expectations on how to achieve success.

They expect a magical class to turn them into life gurus, when in reality, they have no idea what they really want to achieve.

And here comes the million-dollar question: What the heck do we want? If we don't know, we end up fatigued, zombie-style like "The Walking Dead", but without the excitement of being in a TV series.

This is not only exhausting, but it leaves us stuck in a puddle of unhappiness.

I suggest you schedule a time to read: Discover the true secret of happiness: beyond yoga



What science says about unhappiness




And science agrees: studies conducted at the universities of UCLA and North Carolina ensure that having a clear purpose in life is like the GPS of happiness. Without it, we are more lost than Adam on Mother's Day.

So, dear reader, how are you doing with your goals? Do you feel like you are truly dedicating your time and energy to what matters to you, or are you pursuing others' goals like a little dog chasing its own tail?

Professor Fuller emphasizes something vital: we want coherence between personal and professional life. If you have a boss who could well be the villain of a soap opera, and you stay there just for the salary, something is wrong. You can't be the Charlie Sheen of your professional life and expect to be the Buddha of your personal life. It is important to have integral coherence.

Think about it: How many times have you dreamed that a salary increase or a new job would turn you into the Tony Stark of well-being? Well, unrealistic expectations can end up in a great disappointment. No, my friend, money doesn't always buy happiness. Maybe a bunch of cool gadgets, yes, but genuine happiness... not so much.

Now, psychology gives us a great piece of advice: be honest with ourselves. Are we really following our dreams or someone else's Pinterest dreams? Clarity about our goals and the courage to be realistic is already a big step to leave the club of the unhappy.

Finally, happiness is not a final destination that you reach with a little map and a compass. It is more like a path that is traced day by day. There are bumps, there are puddles, but if you know exactly what you are looking for and stay true to that, the journey will be much more satisfying.

So, go ahead! Review your goals, define your priorities, and build a life that makes sense to you.

And, of course, do not worry about the challenges that will appear; they are part of the ride, and what a wonderful ride it can be!

By the way, I have written a related article on how to be a more positive person and attract people: The 6 ways to be more positive and inspire others.



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I am Alegsa

I have been writing horoscope and self-help articles professionally for over 20 years.

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