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Relationship arguments? A scientific study reveals how to avoid them

Relationship issues? A study reveals that a 5-second pause improves dialogue and prevents conflicts. Learn more in Nature magazine....
Author: Patricia Alegsa
21-08-2024 18:57







  1. The Importance of Pauses in Discussions
  2. Research on the Effect of Pauses
  3. The Conflict and its Dynamics
  4. Tips for Managing Conflicts

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The Importance of Pauses in Discussions



Conflict is inevitable and usually occurs in all personal relationships. What are the causes?

Sometimes, they are clear; other times, they get lost in the heat of the argument. However, a recent study published in the journal Nature Communications Psychology has shown that taking breaks of just five seconds during a discussion can help calm fights between couples.

This brief pause can act as a firebreak that prevents minor disagreements from escalating and, consequently, damaging the relationship.


Research on the Effect of Pauses



Researchers from the University of St. Andrews conducted experiments with 81 couples and found that taking a five-second pause was as effective as longer breaks of ten or fifteen seconds for managing lower-level conflicts.

Annah McCurry, a PhD candidate in psychology and neuroscience, emphasized that this approach is a simple, free, and effective trick to reduce negative emotions during discussions.

The use of artificial intelligence and machine learning in the study allowed for the analysis of couples' emotional responses, revealing that brief pauses altered the pattern of retaliation and led to lower overall aggression.

Discover 8 ways to have a more stable and happy romantic relationship


The Conflict and its Dynamics



Rosalía Alvarez, a psychoanalyst specializing in couples, explains that conflict in a relationship is a dynamic cause of interconnection between the two, where the actions of one influence the other.

Fights can arise from differences in parenting, religious beliefs, political opinions, money management, or lack of mutual appreciation. The key is to identify the underlying issues that cause disputes to escalate.

In couples therapy, it can be discovered that many of these tensions have roots in family histories or repetitive behavior patterns.


Tips for Managing Conflicts




For the strongest confrontations, experts recommend talking after calming down. This allows for clarifying the situation and seeking constructive solutions. Additionally, Alvarez suggests holding weekly dialogue meetings, like a coffee or a walk alone, to improve communication and exchange.

It is important to remember that disagreements are not the problem; what can really affect the relationship is the lack of dialogue.

The implementation of brief pauses and the commitment to open communication can be significant steps to strengthen the connection between couples and manage conflicts more effectively.



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